As we roll into 2012, I am actually taking a minute to reflect on the year behind me and the year that lies ahead. Usually I am very anti- New Years Resolution type of girl, because I think it is ridiculous that individuals wait until a calendar tells them to make a change in their lives. I think you should just take the initiative to embrace the good in life and change what you don’t like regardless of the time of year. However after the events of this past year, I feel like I need to refocus my life and start anew… even if it’s just an arbitrary calendar date telling me to do so.
During my reflections over the past few days, weeks and months, there is one theme that keeps popping up. I find myself wanting to do something but telling myself I have to wait because the timing is not right. The repeated statements of “someday I’d like to do X…” or “when I finish Y then I’ll be able to do Z…” are starting to feel a bit old and tired. I’m realizing that it feels like I am always waiting on some activity to be completed or something to fall into place.
With the turn of this new year, I’ve decided that I’m sick of waiting. I’m sick of playing defense. I need to go back on offense. I’ve been playing defense ever since I started grad school last fall, just trying to survive my day to day life. I still have 11 months of grad school left, and it’s going to be a trying 11 months, but in the words of the late Collin Haight, “Take whatever you do, and go at it like a mad freaking bull.”